Tag Archives: Grandmama

Hoppy Easter

It is so hard and tragic for me to be doing Easter all by myself this year.  Röbby thought he might take the children to his mother’s for the holiday, but I couldn’t bear to be without my lil’ angles on such an important day!

Hummus’s cute little preschool had a special event on Saturday morning where the children of the church members participated in a prayer vigil and the worldly children met the Easter bunny.  Such fun for everyone!

3:26:16 Easter bunny

Hummus is so reserved and he wasn’t crazy about the Easter Bunny!  He might have preferred the prayer vigil.  LOL.

This morning we all got dressed up and got ready for church, but there wasn’t a convenient service.

3:26:16 easter duds

We looked amazing.

We spent the day driving around looking for a good church.  A lot of the congregations looked kind of lower class.  The kids all got hungry and started crying and obviously I couldn’t be expected to make an entire dinner on my own.  I dropped them off at Grandmama’s late afternoon.  I hope she enjoyed them!

Happy Thanksgiving 2015

On Wednesday I volunteered to deliver the meal that the PTO had collected to a needy family who has actual children at our school.  I didn’t realize that there were poor people in our school district.  We pay high taxes so we don’t have to live near poor people.  By volunteering I looked caring, found out who the poor family was (no one my kids play with, thank goodness) and saw what everyone donated (thanks for the $.69 can of cranberry sauce, Johansen family,  I hope you were still able to feed your own family after that generous contribution).

Margie had made a lovely spinach gratin that I was sure the poor family wouldn’t really appreciate, so I replaced it with some canned beets I had in the cupboard and put it in a pretty casserole and wallah!  My contribution to Thanksgiving dinner with Grandmama was complete.

On Thursday we slept in and then started getting dressed for dinner at Grandmama’s.  Röbert was surprised she had wanted to host us since she has been pretty standoffish since that time the children destroyed her precious antique carpet, but I told him that she had called late at night and was quite insistent, despite being obviously tired and slurring her words a bit.

My lil' turkey looked adorable, as usual.

Starling sang Turkey in the Straw for 8 hours straight.  Adorable!  I can’t believe they go back to school on Monday.

I came downstairs and you will never guess who was waiting in my living room?  Stefan!   We had agreed not to see each other but he told me that when Röbby called him he couldn’t resist.  It was very awkward, but it was nice to see him and he brought the most beautiful flowers.

The chemistry is just undeniable when you see us together.

The chemistry is just undeniable when you see us together.

We all piled in the car with my lovely gratin and a pecan pie that Stefan had brought, but when we got to Grandmama’s she was just leaving to come to our house for dinner.  She is obviously a very a confused old lady.  She started accusing me of all sorts of unsavory things and we had to leave in a hurry.  When I got home I ran up to my room to cry and then I had a terrible my grain.  It was just so awful with my special guest and on such a wonderful family day.  Röbert made soup for the kids for dinner and I had a lil’ sip of vodka.  After dinner I told Röbert to play some board games with the kids and I went up to bed.  Once again, St. Lah Lee saves the day.

Happy Independence Day!

We got up bright and early this morning and dropped off Hummus with his Grandmama for the day.  I had left him there yesterday, but I guess she didn’t understand that she was supposed to keep him, because her housekeeper was waiting with him in my house when I got home yesterday afternoon and she didn’t seem at all pleased with me.  Ugh.  Why is Röbert’s mom such a pill?  Anywho, she was so insistent on a specific pick up time today and I was really surprised that Röbby said late afternoon.  The camp is a bit of a drive but late afternoon?  It turns out that there is a tournament at the end of camp!!!!  Horrible!  I was expected to sit through several games of soccer and an awards ceremony?!?!

I can’t even begin to describe how tedious it was.  Some of the parents seemed to think we were all there to make friends and this one man had a mustache and was wearing a Game of Thrones t-shirt.  I died.

The awards ceremony was very cheering though.  Lots and lots of awards for my lil’ angle!  He got some dumb ones of course “Kindest Kid” and “Most Spirited”  (I’ll say he is spirited!) but then he won the overall award for best player in camp so the mustache guy and his troll wife can suck it.

We drove back to Grandmama’s to pick up Hummus and were heading out to the lake but I had forgotten Starling’s outfit for tonight at home.  Röbert kept insisting that we couldn’t go home, but I needed that outfit, so I cried until he brought me back to get it.

Guess who is having her lil’ Fourth of July party again this year, despite being humiliated and fat and single and having not a friend in the world?  Karen.  I guess she waited until I was out of town having a fab overnight at a gorgeous lake house with my hot husband to bribe a few other pathetic people to come over and eat her food.  Whatever.

The lake is very upscale for a lake and the house is darling.  Small, but Röbby did well.

And Starling looks so cute in her lil’ outfit that I am sure Röbert agrees that the detour home was well worth it!

Ahoy mateys!  Batten down the hatches for adorableness.

Ahoy mateys! Batten down the hatches for adorableness.

I don’t care at all about Karen’s stupid party but I would love to know who is there and what is happening.  Not that it isn’t obviously completely pathetic, but still.  Also, since it is right next door, I feel like I should have been invited or at least informed.  Not that I care at all.  I wonder who she even found who would come to her awful, grim party?  I couldn’t care less.


Gettin’ My Shop On

I have to admit that this week has been a bit of a disappointment with Starling.  All she wants to do is go to the pool with Amber, and when they get there they just sit at a table near the snack bar and talk about all the girls they don’t like.  How much is there even to say about Fat Alice in a bathing suit?  Hideous…done.  But apparently that topic is way more meaningful than quality time shopping with mean ol’ Mom.

This morning I had planned to take her to the city.  Röbert’s mother had agreed to take Hummus for the day tomorrow, so he wouldn’t get bored driving up to pick up Merlin (that was the fastest week ever!) and so I dropped him off a bit early this morning with her housekeeper while she was at the hairdresser.  I am sure she will be delighted with her little surprise!

When I got home, Starling was dressed but not cooperating at all.

Sullen little thing.

Sullen little thing.

I’ll admit that I lost my temper and raised my voice the tiniest bit with her.  She said she didn’t want to go.  Oh well, more credit cards for me!  I let her get in her swimsuit and dropped her off with Cari again.  Girls!

I had a wonderful morning shopping till I felt like dropping and now I am going to stop into a nice cocktail bar and have something refreshing before my spa treatments this afternoon. Both things I couldn’t have done with Starling in tow!  I want to be all sleek for the weekend.

I am not completely heartless.  I have some lovely frocks for Starling in the bags!

I am not completely heartless. I have some lovely frocks for Starling in the bags!

After we pick Merlin up tomorrow, Röbert has arrange for a house on a lake for the night.  It had better be nice, because I am missing a fourth of July black tie dinner with my book club.  I am so excited; a lil’ luxury lake excursion!

Sunday, Funday

Röbert and I have been talking a lot about how to spend more time together as a couple.  He suggested we spend some time in the mountains together yesterday and then he and I could go shopping together another day.  That sounded like a great idea.  We dropped the kids off at Röb’s mom’s house on Saturday night after the baseball game, and we got up early yesterday morning and headed up to the mountains.  He had bought me some cute-ish hiking boots when he got the baseball stuff for Merlin and I had some adorable hiking short-shorts and a sporty fitted t-shirt, so I would look the part of an outdoorsy gal!

Cari has been through a divorce and she gave me excellent advice about acting as if I like the stuff Röbert likes.  She told me to pretend that I was hiking on a treadmill at the gym, and I did.  It was mostly not terrible.  And of course it was divine to have some time alone with the hub.

He packed a cute lil’ picnic for us of some sandwiches (LOL!  Bread!) but he also had grapes and the darling man had a split of champagne in there for me too!  He knows and loves his wife.

Mr. Mountain man!

Mr. Mountain man!

I was tired after lunch but Röbert brought me to a beautiful waterfall, which was very romantic.  It was too cold to swim, but we dangled our feet in.  The hike down was much easier and I pretended I was doing cross-fit the whole time.

Grandmama loved having her littles with her for the day, so it was a win for everyone!

I have to look up hikers on the internet later and figure out if I might end up with some weird looking muscles if I do this too often.

Boys Will Be Boys

Last night I had totally had it with Merlin.  He was acting wild and getting his sister all wound up with his antics.  I had plans to go to “Fifty Shades of Grey” with my book group and then Röbert called to let me know that he was going to have to work late for the third time this week.  I ran next door to drop the kids with Karen, but she was out too!  Mitch was there, but he saw me before I could leave the kids in his family room (they would have been no bother! Hummus has had diarrhea for the last week and a half but other than that and Starling’s cough, they are fine) and he made me take them home with me.  My parents are out of town, so I decided to drop them with their Grandmama, Röbert’s mom. Let me just say, I find her quite scary, and normally I would never consider her as a babysitter, but this was an emergency (hello, Fifty Shades of Grey!) so I snuck them in the back door with their medicine and overnight bags and just ran.

Of course I turned off my phone and had a wonderful evening out with my gang of gal pals.  We stopped at TGIF’s for laughs and frozen drinks on the way home, and I had to call Uber, since I was in no fit state to drive.

When I walked in the back door I sobered up pretty quickly when I saw the look on Röbert’s face.  Since his mom and I have been feuding for the last few years she hasn’t seen the kids in quite awhile.  She was already in bed asleep when I dropped them off, and she had no idea that they were even in her house until she was awoken by a loud crashing noise downstairs.  Apparently Merlin had knocked over one of her knickknacks, which she claims is priceless artwork.  Whatever, she shouldn’t have that stuff out with children around.

My bad.  He was a lil' crazy since I gave him a couple of adderals to see if they would make him even smarter.

My bad. He was a lil’ crazy since I gave him a couple of adderals to see if they would make him even smarter.

I was hoping this sleepover would serve as a peace offering and repair our relationship, but Merlin ruined that too.