Tag Archives: bullying.

Dressing Merlin, Part 3 Million

I just got a phone call from the big kids’ school telling me that I had to hurry down for some kind of emergency.  In fact, it was such a huge emergency that, when they couldn’t get me by phone they called my gym and had one of the trainers come find me in barre class.  I thought that someone was possibly trying a hostile takeover of the PTO or something.  It was just Merlin again, and this time it wasn’t an award.  He was in the office pitching a big fit about his clothes.  I am sorry that I have been too busy being a supper mom to get the laundry done.  Most lil’ boys would love to wear something that their Daddy wore as a child.

He looks cute as a button.  I have no idea why he made such a big deal about it!

He looks cute as a button. I have no idea why he made such a big deal about it!

The school secretary said that even the kindergarteners were teasing him.  Well, they need to teach those children a lesson on not bullying!  They certainly were all over that when Starling might have said something the tiniest bit unkind about Fat Alice.  They said no more leiderhosen.  We’ll see.  I don’t like being bossed around.

Problem Solved

I’d had enough of Starling hanging around and asking me to do things with her all day yesterday, so I packed her off to school this morning, kicking and screaming.  When we got there I had to drag her inside to the office and it turns out that she had actually been suspended again for bullying.  The reason she refused to go to school yesterday was because Röbert and I were supposed to go in for a meeting with the principal and a school counselor and the poor little dear was scared to tell us.

This adorable lil' moppet would never bully anyone! She's a lover, not a fighter, Paul.

This adorable lil’ moppet would never bully anyone! She’s a lover, not a fighter, Paul.

I met with them alone, and signed her up to talk to the school counselor twice a week instead of going to music class.  Mrs. Weems, who teaches music, has a really distracting hairline, so Starling can’t concentrate in there anyway.  Starling wasn’t excited about meeting with the weird school counselor until I explained that it was a good place to complain about friends.  I think she needs an outlet for that.

Once that was taken care of, I was free to leave her there, so I scampered right over to the gym.  I have missed my morning routine!

After Pilates for Pros, I was walking to the bookstore, when I happened to see Renata again.  She was sitting at that new outdoor cafe next to the park, enjoying what looked like a frothy, fattening cup of java.  How lovely for her.  Maybe it will give her the energy to stalk me some more!

I know some people think she is "cutish" but I just don't see it.

I know some people think she is “cutish” but I just don’t see it.

As I passed her, I noticed that she got up to go inside the building for a moment.  In this day and age it is really not safe to leave food and beverages unattended, but maybe it is fine in Guam or Canada or wherever she is from.  It is really none of my business.

After I had made my purchase at Books A Million, Krystyn called to let me know that Fat Alice’s mom was signed up for Spin to the 90’s again, so I was racing back to gym to see that, when I heard sirens.  I was shocked to see who was being loaded into an ambulance.

I wonder what could have happened that she became ill so suddenly?  She looked fine twenty minutes earlier.

I wonder what could have happened that she became ill so suddenly? She looked fine twenty minutes earlier.

Renata being taken to the hospital does make me reflect on the fragility of life.  I will give my three lil’ angles an extra big hug before I pack them up to bed tonight!

I wonder how I can support Ty through this crisis?  I am sure he really doesn’t care, but I want to be a friend to him anyway.  I hope she isn’t a marijuana addict or have a heroin problem or something.

What Would You Do?

I may have mentioned before that Starling is absolutely brilliant and a wonderful student, but she finds school difficult.  This year has been particularly hard on my lil’ princess.  There were some claims that she was a bully (untrue), a couple or maybe four or five suspensions for bullying and then the inevitable bullying by other students and their parents about Starling being a bully.  That is not right!

She has also been complaining about being bored all year and I have had multiple phone calls with her teachers about what they need to do to challenge Starling more.  She would like more field trips, more high interest enrichment like performing plays about fairies that she writes, dressage instead of gym class, and just more.  The teachers seem uninterested in even discussing our ideas, particularly very late at night when I have my best ideas, and I am feeling frustrated.

This morning Starling told me that she was no longer going to go to school.  She didn’t fight me or anything, just refused to go.  I immediately called that lovely private school in the next town over to see if I could drop her off there (I thought that Röbert and I could figure out the tuition etc. later).  Did you know that you have to apply ahead of time to go to fancy private schools?  Wow.  I just thought you needed to show up with a check.  Also, more expensive than I expected.

Homeschooling is a no go.  I am far too busy with my blog etc. to have time for that.  But what can I do?  Is there a free alternative to school?  Something that is super-convenient for me?

She is far too smart for her public school teachers.

She is far too smart for her public school teachers.


Amazing Discovery

I stopped by the Wozinski’s yesterday to discuss sharing our homeschooling duties.  Boy, they sure aren’t very friendly all of a sudden!  I guess just because their girls aren’t pretty enough to hang with Starling, they are blaming her for all of their troubles.  Woo boy, look inside yourselves, girls, because that is where the problem is.  And judging by their rude mom, I can guess why they might not be super popular!

At first I was all excited that if they were the ones blaming Starling for “bullying” them, then problem solved, I can send her right back to school.  But do I really want her in an environment that tells her that her behavior is wrong?  Just because she is so beautiful? I am not sure.

I was looking up ways to homeschool her online that wouldn’t cost ME too much time and I made an amazing discovery.  Have you ever heard of unschooling?  It is incredible.  So basically you don’t have to do a thing and because children are so naturally smart and curious they end up teaching themselves!  I couldn’t believe my eyes.  I would have Merlin do it too, but he can be a lil’ much with all of his, “What is this article about Mommy?” or “Do you know what a supernova is?”.  He exhausts me because, I don’t know and no and excuse me, I am reading my Us Weekly right now.

So we started today and Starling watched Judge Mathis, People’s Court, another court show with a cute hispanic looking judge, and 2 episodes of Cheaters.  I think she might be a lawyer someday!

She is also teaching herself  to dance.  I think unschooling may just work out for us!

She is also teaching herself to dance. I think unschooling may just work out for us!

I am not sure if I can do this though.  I kept forgetting that she was home and ended up running out for important meetings (a spa appointment, a meeting with a friend who is selling this incredible eyelash treatment, Pilates, and my acupuncturist) but every time I got home she was still watching these very educational court shows.  I am so proud of her!

Our Holiday Letter

It is important to me to keep in touch with our friends and family, so I write a beautiful holiday letter every December, which I include with my Christmas card.  Everyone loves it, and I hear from many people about how much it means to them.  It is hard to find time in my busy schedule to compose it, but I like to inspire others, soooo…

This year was particularly wonderful for my family, and the letter practically wrote itself, but I had a hard time with the Christmas photo.  Röbert wouldn’t let me hire a photographer or buy something expensive for us to pose in front of (who doesn’t want a new cigarette boat? Röbert apparently.) so I had to come up with something that looked all cute and “I don’t care”.

Here is the photo and the letter…enjoy!

The flap says "bear cheeks", like bare cheeks. Get it?  LOL LOL!

The flap says “bear cheeks”, like bare cheeks. Get it? LOL LOL!

Dear Friends and Family,

2014 has been another very amazing and blessed year for us. We have had quite a bit of success, but the most important thing for us has been how close we are as a family, and the love we share with the world.

Röbert and I decided that 2014 would be a year devoted to travel, and we certainly have done that!  Luckily my parents live close by and adore taking care of our babies, so we can go on a whim.  Röbert has been to Omaha, Tulsa, and Bettendorf on business trips this year, and he spends a lot of time in the mountains.  I also had an amazing trip to San Jose in July.  I was there for a life changing professional conference.  Unfortunately, all of the trips we intended to take with the children (except a quick getaway to the beach) ended up being cancelled due to our busy, busy schedule.

Röbert has been working hard (as usual).  He also spends his weekends walking mountains and other mountain activities.  Also playing drums.  The important point is how deeply in love we are and how we have the best marriage I have ever, ever seen.  Even better than Cousin Stacey’s marriage to Eric.  I know all my older relatives think Eric is the greatest thing since the typewriter, but honestly, enough. Love you, Röbert!  Our marriage is solid.

Starling continues to be a beautiful and talented little girl.  In February she played the part of “Third Rabbit” in the class play.  She was amazing.  Hello Broadway!  She also has excelled in her academic life.  She got a B in math on her end of year report card, and a B- in science.  Everyone knows that girls never get such high grades in these subjects…genius alert!  LOL.  Right now Starling is enjoying a contemplative period in her life, where she is examining her choices carefully and often deciding that she will pass on opportunities.  I know she would be an excellent classical, hip hop and modern dancer, she just isn’t interested in that area at present.  And, as we all know, there would not be enough time for everyone to watch her youtube dance videos as well as those that Margot posts of lil’ cousin Whimsy’s recitals.  Haha, just kidding Margot, Whimsy seems to be catching up with her peers nicely.  Starling signed up for synchronized swimming last spring, but unfortunately all of the other girls in the class turned out to be creeps, so it just wasn’t fun enough for her.  The school also practically begged her to join the elite “Gifted and Talented” class, but Starling felt she could be helpful to the less gifted by staying in the mainstream class and leading the dummies by example.  She is sooo kind and giving!

Merlin plays guitar, and drums and has taught himself to write computer code and started a robotics club and a latin club at his school.  He had to quit all of his sports and after school art activities because it was way too hard for us to keep up with them.  He is in the gifted class at school…he takes after me this way.  Those of you who have known me a long time will remember what a great thinker I was as a young child and the many intellectual ideas and opinions I had.  I was also the prettiest girl in my class, like Starling, but that is neither here nor there.

Hummus is just the sweetest lil’ thing.  It is perfectly normal for babies these days, especially very smart ones, to take a lil’ extra time to start walking and standing.  You know how it is harder than ever for college graduates to get jobs?  It is EXACTLY like that for babies.  It just takes longer for them now.  Everyone knows this, so when Hummus stood for the first time last week it really was like he is advanced even though he took longer than old fashioned analog babies.  He hasn’t had a chance to practice standing since then, because I am always on the go with my gym and book club and important meetings at Starbucks about the podcast Serial, but I am sure he will do it again early next week (this weekend is crazy, right?)

Now a lil’ about boring old me.  I have been as busy as ever with going to the gym and the spa and the coffee shop and book club.  My gal pals and I also like to have a glass of wine from time to time, LOL. This year I learned about tea, which is fascinating and tastes different from coffee, even though it is usually also served hot.  There is a new tea house in town where I spend a lot of time.  I have also taken up yoga and do it occasionally with my new friend, Ty, who I met through Merlin, of all people.  The most important change this year is my exciting new career as a blogger!

“What is a blogger?” you ask.  Well, we bloggers write down our important ideas and opinions on the internet, opening up our deepest feelings and ideas to the scrutiny of the universe.  It is often a painful and harrowing experience, but it is what I am called to do.  Being a blogger is an important, important job, and many people rely on us to form their opinions for them as well as to entertain them.  These same people, the ones for whom I cut my heart out and serve it up on a platter each time I write, can be cruel and say terrible things about my children (someone once said Starling looked chubby).  “It sounds difficult and painful.  Why do you do it?”  I do it because blogging is important to us as individuals and America as a country,  In July I went to an important blogging conference.  It was amazing and I made many, many new friends.

I also learned how to be a dog trainer and animal investigator and saved my dear friend, Karen Sullivan’s dog Beefeater many, many times this year.  Poor Beefeater is a troubled dog, and we all wish the best for him and the entire Sullivan family.

This fall I started an anti-bullying campaign in my town.  Because I am an important blogger now, I think I will make it go “viral” and go all around the world.  Going viral is a blogger term, btw.  It is one of the ways I can give back, just a lil’ bit, to the world.  Bullying and gossip are both super mean ways of isolating people from their peers.  My adorable Starling has been a victim of bullying and gossip this year, even though she is by far the prettiest and most popular girl in the class.  Fat Alice and that little bitch Chloe need to learn their place!

It is important at this time of year to remember “the reason for the season”.  Christmas (and other holiday) blessings to everyone.


Lah Lee and her gang





Gossip is Wrong!

I can barely bring myself to write this post because I have been crying all morning long!

I started the day trying on outfits for Thanksgiving.  The Sullivans have asked us over for dessert after dinner and I want to look my best.

Too much?  I think I look very elegant but probably should let Röbert do most of the cooking on Turkey Day!

Too much? I think I look very elegant but probably should let Röbert do most of the cooking on Turkey Day!

I was rudely interrupted by a phone call from The mother of Starling’s friend, Martha.  I can’t remember the mom’s name.  She is in one of my spin classes and is so slow and uncoordinated.   A couple of us like to get behind her and imitate her, LOL.  Anywhoo, she was uninviting Starling from the slumber party tonight!  Can you believe it?  She said Starling is a bully and Martha is afraid of her.  I told her that it was all petty gossip and she should be a better person and ignore it.  She hung up on me.  How completely rude!  I called all of my friends and told them what a bitch she is and also maybe mentioned that she has been diagnosed with a borderline personality disorder which, while not entirely true, I am sure she would be if she went to a psychologist like she needs to.

Gossip is so cruel and it hurts, actually hurts, people like my own lil’ angle, Starling.  I think I may start an anti bullying and gossip campaign or something.

Starling was upset and so we cried together for hours.  Then I went out and bought her a nice guitar because she said she might want to play it and won’t Martha and her mother be sorry when she is a famous singer songwriter and Martha is just a nothing.

Out of the the way Taylor Swift, here comes Starling!

Out of the the way Taylor Swift, here comes Starling!

I made peanut butter crackers for dinner tonight because I was exhausted from crying.  Can you believe I forgot that Merlin is allergic to peanuts? LOL.