Category Archives: food and nutrition

A Lil’ Setback

The silly lil’ rule about not exercising for a few weeks (Weeks!  Not days!  Weeks!) has started getting to me a tiny bit so I headed off to the gym this morning after dropping the kids off, just to hang out.  By mistake I somehow ended up in “Spin to Win” and tore an eensy bit of my stitches out.  Ouchy!  Krystyn brought me over to the hospital and they stitched me right back up and gave me some more painkillers.  Thank goodness, because I was almost out and my doctor’s office has been very stingy about giving me more.

To celebrate I had a couple of extra pills with a teensy glass of vodka and celery.  I feel a lil’ dizzy but I guess it is time to pick Hummus up from school.  I think we will all have some Benadryl for dinner, for our sniffy noses.

Fatty Fat Fat

Starling has been a bit of a piggy lately.   She gobbles down the carrot I let her have after school, and I once even caught her eating half a slice of cheese when she thought I wasn’t looking.  She has no idea how quickly her metabolism will catch up with her, obviously.

Right now I have her on a strict diet because, as beautiful as she is, she is kind of “sturdy”.

It is hard for lil’ girls.  Their friends are all cruel and make fun of them for the slightest thing.  I would hate for Starling’s friends to see her eating a big ol’ handful of celery or maybe a carb filled cracker, and make fun of how fat her thighs are.  I want to protect her from the cruelties of childhood.

Exactly how hard is it to resist a fat filled cake?  I have no idea why she cried for over an hour.  I was able to resist it easily.

Exactly how hard is it to resist a fat filled cake? I have no idea why she cried for over an hour. I was able to resist it easily.

This afternoon we ended up over at the Sullivans, and Karen had made a cake for the children.  Starling wanted a piece but, excuse me, she doesn’t need any cake.  She needs a few laps around the reservoir.  Merlin was getting a second helping (boys are so lucky, no one cares what they look like) and she started crying and begging me for a tiny taste of icing.  I told her that she was acting like a big fat baby, and to knock it off.

We ended up having to leave early because of her terrible behavior.  You would think she would be thanking me for caring about her enough to say, “No.”

I did let her have a slice of apple later as a treat, but she had to spit it out after she chewed it.

And, as soon as she has a proper thigh gap, she can be on a maintenance diet.

She is not fat!

My sister-in-law, who is a real piece of work, sent Starling some hand-me-down clothes this week.  Normally I would never allow one of my children to wear used clothing, but Starling saw the box and was excited to wear some of the dresses.  There is this one dress in particular that she is just wild about.  Unfortunately it makes her look fat. Starling is a tiny little thing and I am wondering if my sister-in-law sent that dress on purpose, to make her look ugly.  What do you think?  Believe me, that woman is capable of just about anything.

I have been making oinking noises and laughing at her in this dress to discourage her from wearing it.

I have been making oinking noises and laughing at her in this dress to discourage her from wearing it.

Do you think the pear shape on the front is a secret message?

I know that Starling is perfect in every way, but I guess I will put her on a diet, just to be on the safe side.

How to Eat

One of my readers asked me to share a cooking post with all of you.  I know that a lot of people wonder how I keep such a slender figure but, like all of the supermodels I know, I just eat whatever I want.  I guess I have a great metabolism.

For my children I love to make kiddie favorites like organic vegan corn dogs and organic gluten-free chicken nuggets.  Organic, vegan and gluten-free mean healthy, so I don’t need to worry about them.  These all go in the microwave and they LOVE them, so it leaves me a lil’ extra time to pamper ME from time to time.

Here is my dinner tonight.  I feel bad that I didn’t take photos of each step, but you will be able to see the finished plates at least.

My first course was a cocktail.   It is my own recipe, a Celery-Vodka Martini, so refreshing!

 

Ingredients:

Thinly sliced celery stalk

Vodka

Vermouth

 

Method:

Slice a celery stalk to the thinnest sliver imaginable.  Slice off any parts that look extraneous,

Pour Vodka in glass, practically to the top.  Think about vermouth and reject the idea, LOL.

Put the celery stalk in the glass and use it to stir the flavors together.

Enjoy!

 

This is so sinful, but a nice treat at the end of the day.

This is so sinful, but a nice treat at the end of the day.

For my main course I had celery soup, which is one of my favorites!  It is so rich and delicious on a cold evening.  It is also one of my very own recipes.

 

Ingredients:

Thinly sliced celery stalk (I use the one from my martini)

2 cups local mineral water

 

Method:

Chop the celery.  Put the water and the celery in a pot and boil it for 25 minutes.  Serve hot.

This is my winter go to recipe.  It fills me right up! I don't usually eat the celery.

This is my winter go to recipe. It fills me right up! I don’t usually eat the celery.

Of course I always want dessert!  I love to eat and, like all the girls I know, I think sweets are the best part of my evening.

 

 

Ingredients:

Freshly whipped cream

Blueberry

Apple

Siracha

 

Method:

Whip some heavy cream with lots of sugar, and some delicious smelling vanilla extract.  Really smell it and think about just how delicious it will taste.

Slice a blueberry super thin.

Slice an apple so thin you can see through it.

Put the sliced blueberry and one slice of the apple on the plate in attractive manner.  Put a dollop of whipped cream on the plate and quickly rinse the spoon before you can be tempted to lick it, even though it smells so fantastic.

Eat one blueberry slice.  Chew the other ones, then spit them out.  Lick the apple slice then cover it and the whipped cream with Siracha so you won’t be tempted to eat them.

OMG!  My favorite recipe ever! I am a real piggy when it gets to dessert, but who cares?

OMG! My favorite recipe ever! I am a real piggy when it gets to dessert, but who cares?

 

I hope you all enjoy my recipes.  Who knows, maybe someday I will write a cookbook.