Soccer Prodigy

Last fall we signed both of our big littles up for soccer.  It seemed like a good sport for networking.  Of course Merlin ended up on a team where all of the parents were haughty and aloof, and his practices and games were all at inconvenient times.  We stopped bringing him after the first weekend. Starling was on a team with her then best friend, Rachel, and Rachel’s dad was the coach, which meant Starling got to play the whole game every week.  But then she and Rachel had a falling out over some little trinket that accidentally ended up in Starling’s book bag, so Starling quit soccer too.  We never even thought about sports after that.

Yesterday after school I looked out back and Starling and Merlin were playing soccer again, and Merlin was really good.  Starling has always been a gifted athlete of course, she takes after me, but Merlin is a nerd.  How did he ever get get to be so good at soccer?

He was doing all of these fancy foot moves and bouncing the ball off his head.

He was doing all of these fancy foot moves and bouncing the ball off his head.

When I asked him where he had learned to play he said that he played it with his friends at school.  That made sense at first, but then I thought about his geeky, weirdo, uncoordinated friends, and I realized he was lying.

I ended up not giving him anything to eat or drink until he told me how he really learned to play soccer.  He was crying and begging and saying, “I promised! I promised!” but children shouldn’t keep secrets from their mom.  After a few hours outside in the cold without a jacket he finally told me; Ty has been teaching him soccer during recess and after school.

Merlin was apparently very upset last fall when we stopped taking him to soccer.  I know that he wept at the time and tried to give me his favorite toys to “pay” for the league fees, but I didn’t think that it really bothered him to quit.  Ty was apparently a star soccer player in college, and he believed he would play in Europe until he had a devastating injury, so he has taken Merlin under his wing and taught him some kicking skills.

You know, everyone teases me about Ty, and how he must have a crush on me, but I thought we were just buddies.  But Ty taking all this time this year with Merlin really makes me wonder; would he be doing this for just any kid?  There obviously has to be a reason that he does special things for him all of the time, like teaching him debating, or give him a Halloween costume, or teaching him soccer.  I certainly feel bad if I have somehow led him on.  I am so very happily married that of course I am not interested in Merlin’s teacher!

 

 

 

32 thoughts on “Soccer Prodigy

  1. A Tranger

    I wonder if Ty had a deprived home life and that’s what made him such a committed teacher to neglected, I mean geeky, kids?

    Regardless, this could be your big chance to bond with Ty, I mean Merlin, over something that matters to him, I mean you. Those parents will sing a different tune if Merlin becomes a star!

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      1. A Tranger

        Söccer does seem like just the right sport for Merlin, given how sophisticated and better than everyone you are. It’s so European, you know. Like Röbert, sort of.

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      2. Yummy Mommy Pregnant Tummy

        I hear badminton and croquet are the next big thing, and also very exclusive and posh. It’s never too early to have Starling exposed to fantastic sons of powerful moms.

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  2. Cindy McCain

    Well well well!!! The plot thickens!!! Isn’t that nice of Ty to do that!

    I wonder… have you ever googled his name? He’s not on any “registries” is he?

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    1. Baseball Babe

      Like Tinder or Match? Or what do you mean, Mrs. McCain? Do you think he’s looking for a wife? If so, obviously Lah Lee is NOT a candidate. Lah Lee, don’t look on the “registries”. It’ll show up in your history and people will get the wrong idea that you and Roebert are not as happily married as you are.

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  3. Mrs. Rothschild

    I think Ty is helping Merlin precisely because you and Ty ARE buddies! What are friends for, you know? Ok, and so Ty has a lil crush on you, too, but don’t worry about leading him on. I think your actions have been above reproach. You’re just living your life, and Ty happens to run into you pretty regularly as you’re just going about your business at state parks and soccer games and such. That’s just what happens when you live out in the ‘burbs, right?

    We can’t really help who crushes on us, either. If his crush means he’s helping Merlin become less nerdy, then great. Maybe Ty sees it as his way of paying you back for letting him be friends with such a hottie.

    You have the cutest kiddos, btw.

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  4. Staci

    Do you think maybe Ty has inappropriate feelings for Merlin?? I mean, he is a male teacher after all — that’s already fishy!

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      1. Staci

        I don’t know, Lah Lee – as a mama to two big littles and one lil little you really can’t be too careful, especially now that you’re a blogging celebrity. I mean, maybe you should try secretly following Ty around for a week or two to see if he does anything suspicious.

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    1. Baseball Babe

      WTHeck, Staci! What is WRONG with you? Why would you suggest Ty is gay? I am so offended. I am embarrassed for you, making leaps like that.

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      1. Staci

        You are incredibly small minded and offensive. I am suggesting that Ty might be a pedophile, not GAY!!! Gay people aren’t attracted to children, good lord! Where and what century are you from anyway???

        And anyway, I was tipped off by his sole patch. What kind of grown man grows facial hair like that?? Looks suspiciously like a child molester, IMO.

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      2. Staci

        well, ok I’m not actually gay or a man. I don’t want to lie about myself on the internet.

        but I COULD be!! so I still demand an apology. I have many friends who are men and some of them are LGBT so I understand what it’s like.

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      3. Baseball Babe

        Staci, one of my BFFLs from the internet – a secret Facebook group I was invited to – is also gay. I have no problem with gay people. My hair stylist is gay, for Heaven’s sake! I am very progressive and socially liberal. I am not politically liberal, though. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. Anyway, I didn’t mean to offend you – I was kind of embarrassed after I posted that but I couldn’t take it back. I usually try to only write supportive things on the internet because the internet it IS forever, you know? Anyway, I should have emailed Lah Lee and requested that she remove my reply. I am sorry. I had a sangria a few hours before I read here and I guess it went to my head. Ooops. Anyway, I thought you were implying that Ty was gay since Merlin is a boy, KWIM?

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  5. Equestrian Pilates Mama

    Very strange. At first I just thought that you and Ty were naturally n’sync with one another, sharing the same hobbies and interests, but now I think he might be a lil obsessed.

    Conspiracy theory right over here – What if Ty is using all this ‘mentoring’ to gain info on you and then coincidently appearing at your activities.
    You know, I have always thought it was a lil strange that Merlin is in the genius class and not Starling, when she is clearly your gifted child.

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    1. mythreeangles Post author

      Of course the school really wanted Starling in the genius class but she didn’t want to be in the weirdo room with her brother. She volunteered to go back to her regular classroom to help the stupid and unattractive kids feel better about themselves.

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      1. mythreeangles Post author

        Thanks, Cindy. My children just give, give, give and then small-minded people call Starling a bully. I won’t stand for the kind of bullying anymore! #nobullyingbullies

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  6. Pearshaped

    I am sure it is all perfectly harmless. As your platonic soulmate, Ty must have picked up that you worry about Merlin because, let’s face it, he hasn’t released his inner cool kid yet, what with all those geeky things he does. How nice of Ty to spend time helping Merlin and not wanting to make you feel like you owe him or something. You are so blessed to have all those nurturing and caring people in your life, but I shouldn’t be surprised, what goes around, comes around after all.
    Those people thinking that there was something strange about this, need to Silkwood shower their minds. You should be ashamed of yourselves! Don’t you have some bills to pay instead of indulging in filthy thoughts? Ty and Merlin were planning to surprise Lah Lee, that’s all!

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  7. PSL Mama

    Wow! Is there anything that big little Merlin cannot do? Debate, archery, the genius class, laundry, bathing his brother, and now soccer. He is going to make some woman very happy someday Lah Lee!

    I do think Ty is quite smitten with you but I bet he just enjoys the time with his little prodigy, Merlin too. Ignore those pedophile fear mongers.

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    1. Cindy McCain

      Merlin’s okay. But Sterling is clearly the star of the show. Girls are just naturally talented and Sterling is an extremely talented girl. And with her loving, involved mother Lah Lee showing her the ropes and modelling healthy relationships with other loving human beings and food, Sterling will become a skinny, popular expert at love, life and happiness!!

      Lah Lee, have you thought about doing a photoshoot with Sterling, using a professional photographer? Those are always fun growth moments. And then Sterling could see for herself where her problem areas are and maybe do a lil toning or photoshopping.

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      1. Pesky Boys

        Maybe a combined mommy-daughter fashion shoot, plus a few risqué boudoir shots of you for Roebert? And if there’s time at the end and the boys haven’t gotten messy yet, one of all three kids with you – Father’s Day is coming up soon!

        Just be careful when showing people at school the “safe” photos, like showing Ty how nice Merlin’s older sister looks, that you don’t accidentally show him the naughty shots! You know how easily that can happen…

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  8. Equestrian Pilates Mama

    Cindy, you are so wise! The photoshoot is such a great idea that you should consider Lah Lee.
    Aside from helping Starling to recoginse her problem areas, it might also help her to optimize her best angels. I think that photo of Starling playing soccer is just darling, but there would be people who look at it and think shes a lil fatty.
    The world can be a cruel place, it’s never too early to start learning to look picture perfect 100% of the time.

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